if they said it once, they'd say it a thousand times more.
"you got some growing up to you. relationship and maturity wise"
but how can you when you 're on a level that one one is on?
yeah, yeah he told me i had a mind set of a 12 year old when it comes to boys, but he dumb me down into thinking so. but others showed me otherwise. my guy friends told me that i need someone who's grown (but who doesn't). overall i'm a "imma hold you down even if it kills me" kinda girl. when i "fall" i fall hard. that person is my main focus, other guys are not even in consideration. some failed to realize that and let their insecurities get in the way. usually i do that.
it's usually like my guards up to high and i push away, or it's too low and i let things slide or i just don't care period and just like having a boyfriend around. but now it's something different. people showed me in the past that this might be a real deal for a minute, never really took it in cause again the situation had to deal with our levels. we're around the same place, at the same time we fool around like it's nothing. just ordinary shit.
i guess what i'm trying to say is that, i'm just going to stay chill. maybe speak on it. but for now i'm going to see and feel out for vibes. thing with me i'm good with reading vibes, i just don't say anything at all on it cause i'm like that i guess. but whatever though.
there's just some feelings i try to explain and pray they make sense either later or instantly so i can move forward on that.
so do i think i'm maturing? more then ever now. this is all a part of knowing my wants, my needs, keeping my feelings first and staying grounded. something like that.
my knowing stage.