Tuesday, December 28, 2010

It's Over

i just can't deal anymore.
i wanna sleep, i wanna eat. i wanna be able to cope. i wanna function like i used to. i seriously want to forget you.
i don't wanna be friends, heck i don't even want to talk to you now. you are what i like to call SELFISH.
yeeep. and i'm using it in direct CONTEXT. at least i know how to use words and not throw them around. well i wouldn't know how you use words. heck i probably don't even know the real you. that's one thing i can't deal with. your scared for what? to let me in? you think keeping up these walls is going to make you a better person? it's just hiding your true self from the world. but that's OKAAY! because i'm at my brim now. i'm fed up. i'm tired. you drained me. used me up until there was nothing else. funny how i knew this was gonna happen. i saw it. but i let it play out cause i wanted to see if it would change. i guess not. i just put myself up for more hurt and pain from someone who said they were going to protect me from it... so much for that.

all i asked was realness and honesty. guess it was too hard to come by. that's all you asked of me. i gave it to you. on a fucking silver platter too. you were on me so much for not being completely honest with you. and now look. then you wonder why i give so much attitude and have anger towards you. it's because you're just...not seeing the big picture. why am i even bothering to vent? real bitches stick around. that's how you know they're hearts big enough for two. i'm finding it extremely hard to forgive you this time. all the other times is because...well i don't know because. i just did so there was no bad blood.

the thing that really burns the most is that now if you were to even spill out shit like you did before. i might not even take in what you said let alone believe you. sucks cause you basically lost my trust. i never thought i'd live to see this day... sad, sad, sad.

- Aubrey

Friday, December 24, 2010

Hope It's A Soft One...

did i really let my self down?
or was this some kind of lesson in a cloud?
looking through old things, old thoughts, old me.
i drifted so far away, i'm really thinking "how can this be?"
this isn't want i asked for nor did i want this.
but again this is life, i guess i gotta now live with it.
it's just that, it's something i never expected from me, it got too far
i have now pushed the old one down and raised a new barthey say with growth sometimes comes change and understanding.
but i'm now falling, just waiting on that landing... 

Sunday, December 19, 2010

A Change.

how did it feel to have a body laying next to you
a girl who loved you and would always pull though
to take in her scent, to hold on to her body
to feel every inch of her ocean, without it being something naughty
to have her there all night long just laying there, her mind all too strong?
you went there again, you did it. but this time to sticked around though it
even in the end you stayed with her while her thoughts raced on what happened.
you did was a real man should... you made her feel somewhat comfortable.
made her forgot about the world and her problems.
even with the ball you thought she'd fumble but she made her way through
cause on that ball, her name was written right next to you.
the true meaning of her love is written inside her soul
but she's too afraid to even let it show
she's been down that road with you and it's cause her a great deal of stress
but with you she finds it worth it

you're something like a best friend...


- Aubrey

one of those nights.

telling me the sky's the limit.
my team basically has no limit
so we ain't in the same page, i'm way ahead of my time
gifted, poetic and true, lemme spit this one rhyme
for your ears to eat, let the mind speak
truthful ways, no sinful ways
keep that dirty haze off this deep phase
let the light shine free, body continue to speak
feel and know, that it's our tim to grow...

- Aubrey