Monday, October 24, 2011

urgh.

i find my mom sometimes to be a little annoying, especially when it comes to the money i'll be making. i understand she cares or whatever. at the same time, i wanna be able to do things on my own you know? lemme make my money, leave me alone with it. if i need help i'll ask. why can't that be understood?

- Aubrey

Friday, October 21, 2011

i been away yeah? i know, i know

i've been on the tumblr boat. i must say that i like that blog though. it's interesting and  filled with pictures and shit. hah! but this is and always will be my first. it's like tumblr is a loud party and Blogger is what you're going home to. the bed you go to sleep in after that wild party you know. so i guess you can say i'm ready to sleep now. i missed you yeah? lol. ♥

- Aubrey

usually not sober for this long... withdraws kick in slowly.


i used to use all that shit because you acted like you didn’t know me.
you’re attention was needed.
my body, i abused it.
from the inside out, i wanted you to see that beauty.
i wanted you to see that raw truth, your name was written all over it.
so i smoked till i couldn’t see, i drank till my feet were heavy.
i figured since you just “liked” me sober, you’d love me intoxicated.
i was wrong, too blind to see. i wanted you to see me.
i wanted you to feel me, embrace me
most of all i wanted you to love me. but you didn’t. you loved being inside me.
you loved to use me, you mistreated me.

i’m usually not sober for this long, withdraws are kicking in slowly,
i used to use all that shit because you acted like you didn’t know me.
you’re attention was needed.
my body, i abused it.
i don’t know i spent so much time on a love that wasn’t mind.
the pain was more then unkind.
i seemed like the stupid girl who got pissed drunk for attention
when deep down, all i wanted was your affection.
i was destroying me. you probably knew it too.
you could never understand now much i loved you.
i’d do anything you asked within the blink of an eye
but as soon as i fucked up, you said your goodbyes.

jokes on me huh? what a stupid girl
i would have gave this man everything in my fucking world.
the alcohol and the weed did nothing for me, did nothing for us.
in the end, it slowly betrayed our trust…

i’m usually not sober for this long, withdraws are kicking in slowly,
i used to use all that shit because you acted like you didn’t know me.
you’re attention was needed.
but not anymore, no long will you mistreat this.

on the road to recovery…
- Aubrey