Sunday, February 7, 2010

February 7th 2010 - What's On My Mind

Happy birthday to me first off.

i remember growing up and now my birthdays used to be. kids that i called my friends that lived in the same building as me would always come and celebrate with me. i'd have a small cake with my name on it and i wouldn't even dress up. straight up bum clothes. i honestly didn't really mind doing that sometimes but deep down i didn't really want to. i mean it was the thought that counted i guess right? through out all those birthdays i felt like something was missing, i kinda still feel that. God only knows what..

18. the big 1-8. so many responsibilities pour in now. this is the time. time to grow. all these years i have been, but i gotta do it real fast and strong now. i never thought i could handle what's about to come, but i think i'm ready. i just need focus i guess. there's so many things going on and stuff i have to fix and have it stay that way. but man, this will all take time. just bare with me.

as usual i never get what i truly want for my birthday, it's starting not to phase me...but this one is different. i actually wanted...something. i'm thinking if i should go out and get it? hopefully before 12 or it wouldn't have a purpose...

P.S. birthday kiss?

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