today was the hardest out of most, cause i had to bust out that fake smile pretty much the whole day...
there were times i slipped up or whatever, few booked it. a couple wouldn't shut up about it, the rest played it off.
whatever.
i fought back tears by listening to music, talking to friends, or pretending i was maaad tired. (which i was since i got no damn sleep, and ate no breakfast on top of that...) man i'm trippin out. it's like sand slipping through my fingers. i never beat up on myself like this before. especially this much. i can't express anymore. i'm flabbergasted...
this has NEVER happened before. EVER.
i called the only family i had at that moment, she knows who she is.
she says i'm broken...
she's right.
Thanks for that....
- Aubrey.
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